Really   Bad   Haiku   #16-#20

I love you badly
more than words can ever say
but lose the goatee

you give us music
so sweet and sublime, plus some
Satan pix for Hel

let me sing thy praise
lovely spam, wonderful spam
sorry, wrong subject

Dave, tell me something
what on earth compelled you to
use Peter Frampton?

Ziggy's dead, but I
want to see him, dammit--pure
necrophilia



Really   Bad   Haiku   #21-#25

no, I'm not obsessed
with David Robert Hayward
Jones, I'm not I'm not!

don't blame me, blame Dave
the inspiration behind
my cheesy haiku

no one calls you Dave
except those stupid people
on the Internet

forever known as
the Chameleon of Rock
your mum must be proud

David, darling, please
don't talk of dust and roses
I have allergies


Really   Bad   Haiku   #26-#30

Mother warned me of
you, you lecherous old coot
defiler of youth

Dave, to appease my
MSG wrath, just sing the
Laughing Gnome for me

I've just heard about
Little Toy Soldier--mmm, Dave's
a little kinky

the Seven Dwarves are
in Little Wonder?--David
what were you thinking?

how do you master
the Jean Genie?--simple, just
rub it till he comes

 1997 by Ramona I. Gardea

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